I've been in a really bad mood lately. The days have been filled with pondering the future, evaluating my life as it is right now, and of course, good old-fashioned self-loathing. It seems so lame to feel this way, but I can't apologize for what's been going on.
Normal human beings worry about stuff all the time. I am no exception. I constantly worry about my future and if I'm going to be financially stable. Don't get me wrong, I think I'm doing just fine right now. I have a job at my school and tomorrow, I'm going to see about this business job that could possibly morph into a solid summer job. It's just that with my interests in the creative arts--fashion, writing, and music--I fear for my financial security. I do not want to end up another broke ass black person, re-inforcing the stereotype that none of us will amount to absolutely anything.
Not only this, but I keep worrying about my social well-being. Stuck in this house until the end of the month--my school is very weird with the breaks--I want to do get out and do things as much as possible, but it's hard when your friends are going back before you and the things you want to do aren't even in their interests. Not going out = no pictures for the blog, which makes me even more ashamed to call myself a fashion blogger sometimes.
I'm pretty sure this is just temporary sadness, the type of thing that we all go through every once in a while in our quotidian struggles to matter, but this feeling hits me every once and a while, and hopelessness sets in. The only thing that usually helps is isolation, watching my new favorite teen show from the UK called Skins (an edgier Degrassi if you ask me), and massive amounts of music--namely, Radiohead.
So I will try my damndest to get more going on this blog, meaning more pictures and sexy randomness. Haha. Sexy randomness.
I leave you guys with the song that inspired the title of this post. It sums up how I've been feeling lately. "Quarantine" by Phantom Planet.
By the way, feel free to leave comments if you feel the same way, in college, a bit wayward, not knowing what the future holds. I love all the comments I can get!