stinkfist

i am in love with band t-shirts. there's nothing like pledging allegiance to your favorite band, whilst simultaneously making a fashion statement. 


the semester is almost done. i'm still in therapy. i'm still a fucking whore for all things clothes, and i'm still not sure how i want this blog to be. (i swear, i switch design schemes every two seconds. i'll get a normal rhythm eventually.)


things that i need in my closet very soon:

1. more jeans
2. lace tights
3. a non-shedding leopard print coat (thinking ahead)
4. a beige coat
5. a black maxi skirt
6. a colorful pleated maxi skirt
7. more cardigans!
8. graphic print tees/band tees
9. american apparel disco shorts

among many other things. i'm on a rick kick currently. H&M stepped up their game, because i previously thought only topshop had cute jewelry. cute jewelry that didn't cost so FUCKING much. $28 for a ring? like, for real though?

speaking of american apparel...this is the dress that got away. i should've bought that $40 sexiness when i had the chance. now it's out of my life forever. :(

picture circa 2010

hat: target. coat: H&M. shirt: gift. flannel: old navy. shorts: kmart. boots: kmart. rings: H&M. necklace: my brother's. oh sidenote: my friend said i looked like a sexy hobo in these pics. no reason to put that here with the outfit tags, but i just thought it was a cool description of my style that day. :3

stillness is the move

outfit inspired by solange!

here i sit, perched upon my bed, watching friday and updating le blog. after a hard day at work and two hours spent in the library completing my visual journalism assignment, i seek solace in a tv dinner--because panera is closed. wahh.--a vicodin to soothe my aching gums freshly released from two wisdom teeth, and a movie i've seen a jillion times. 


oh, and if anyone cares, my spring break was filled with the one human need that always seems to elude me. mostly my fault, but nonetheless, i never get enough sleep. at least there's only a few weeks left in the semester. and i'm turning 21 which means i can do whatever the FUUUUUUUUUUCK i wanna do. hello nightlife i never experienced!


and here we are again, making decisions on which summer festival to attend, or both. warped is out of the question because i don't even listen to that music as much as i used to. (sorry, bring me the horizon!) pitchfork and lolla are my two contenders. while P4K is obviously much cheaper and has sleigh bells and hot chip performing (EEEEK!), lolla has many more and i heard red hot chili peppers would perform. hold up hold up whoa dere. 


$45 vs. $90? hmm...
2 people vs. a lot? hmm...
we'll see.


glasses: dollar store find. shawl: forever 21. pants: american apparel. gloves: idk. boots: forever 21. tusk necklace: charlotte russe

strange and beautiful

flannel: urban outfitters (BDG)
tank top: forever 21 (says "like a virgin. love me.")
tutu skirt: american apparel
shoes: urban outfitters (deena and ozzy)
boombox necklace: forever 21
other necklace: stolen from my bro


there's a reason why i titled this post "strange and beautiful."


it's an aqualung song, and one i'm thinking of getting tattooed on me. not quite sure where yet, but i think it has to be done. lately, i've been going through some things. i'm starting to think i have immense personal problems that i want other people to solve, and they can't. i have to save myself from myself instead of some handsome boy. it's like that cheetah girls song called "cinderella." you guys know. the part when they sing "my night in shining armor is me/so i'm gonna set me free." obscure disney reference. don't judge. i've been feeling extremely lonely these days, and i actually cut off communication with the outside world for a whole day, only for my parents to completely overreact and march up to my school. (they actually sent a lady to do a wellness test on me. while i will admit it was my own dumbass fault for not calling them immediately, i still think they overreacted over one day of no contact. my dad actually threatened to call the police and search for me.)


but i digress, this terrible place has made me do some real hard thinking. i always overreact to stupid shit, i get attached to people--mainly boys--waaaaay too easily, and i always feel like absolutely no one likes me and i drive people away. add this to the fact that i've never ever had a boyfriend which i attribute to a myriad of reasons--mainly because i'm black and like the opposite race--and that it usually takes a guy i'm interested in about 2 weeks to ignore me, and voila: you have a recipe for complete disaster. 


i'm talking to my school counselor to set up therapy sessions (students get 10 free ones) so i can sort this mess out. i just can't keep doing this. i have to be stronger than this. while i do think i've been pretty good on my own thus far, it's getting a bit frustrating to see all my friends with love interests or with boyfriends while you're losing each option you get as quickly as it came. it makes you wonder if you're even worthy of what you know you deserve.


going back to the "strange and beautiful" thing, i thought it was such an appropriate song and title. we're all strange and beautiful. there are weird things about all of us that some may find completely disgusting, but others would find breathtakingly amazing. sometimes i feel like i'm too weird/unique/silly/whatever to get anyone. i'm too complicated. that my quirks and everything that makes me "special" are what's actually keeping me from a mate. but i feel like you have to be true to yourself. if you like to spontaneously do the bernie dance--limp limbs like the titular character from the movie weekend at bernie's--then why should you be ostracized for it? its who you are. i'm strange and beautiful. and so are you guys.

there's this theory i'm working on

beret: H&M
necklace: topshop
top: american apparel
coat: H&M


okay, so this is the theory that i have come up with, when it comes to the hierarchy of clothing stores. it's sort of something like this:

• Rainbow - cheap, ugly, skanktastic clothing only consumed by minorities. Lots of "clubwear."
• Wetseal - Same as Rainbow, but a step above, since everyone knows what it is.
• Charlotte Russe - Still cheap, but somewhat classy. Middle ground between Wetseal and A'Gaci.
• A'Gaci - Forever 21's wanna-be little sister.
• Forever 21 - Acceptable, cheap fashion mecca for everyone, despite the sweatshop claims, supposed copyright infringement, and obvious religious affiliation. 
• H&M - Totally acceptable amongst the fashionista set. Good enough to have designers submit their expensive clothes, cheap enough to solicit visitors with their promises of $5 this and $10 that.
• Urban Outfitters - For the hipsters who think they're cool because they paid $75+ for something that looks like it costs way cheaper. Probably have no idea that the outlet exists.
• American Apparel - They barely ever have sales and expect everyone to drop serious cash on a lame stirrup-legginged bodysuit. Tread carefully.
• Topshop - H&M's cooler older sister. This bitch went to college, had at least four different boyfriends, and a life-altering epiphany that made her who she is today. Fucking expensive, and probably only for the richer set. Expect $50 shorts and $100 pairs of jeans if you so desperately want to look like Rihanna.

sleeping lessons

 cardigan: forever 21

top: american apparel

pants: american apparel

necklace: forever 21

shoes: urban outfitters

sunglasses: forever 21

i am practically falling asleep as i type this. 

i stay up entirely too late. give me a month off school, and i abuse that shit like crazy. my procrastination has reached levels of utmost intolerance. i go back to school in two weeks, and this blog is probably the most i will have accomplished since not having school. yes, i go to work, and i feel semi-accomplished doing that, but i still need to work on my portfolio, accept my loans for this year--that goddamned FAFSA is a nagging bitch, i tell you--and maybe look up possible internships. 

sloth is one of the 7 deadly sins. anyone ever watch the movie "se7ven" with brad pitt and morgan freeman? the guy who represented sloth was tied to a bed and left to rot for an entire year until he woke up, freaked the fuck out, and ended up in a hospital after having chewed his own tongue off. 

that sucks.

my body

* Sweatshirt - American Apparel

* Leggings - American Apparel

* Necklace - Forever 21

* Boots - Bongo for KMart

California was pretty cool. Won't lie, it could've been better, but hey, I got out of Illinois for the first time.

The plane ride was soooo cool. It felt like a mini rollercoaster, and I managed to get great pics outside the window. ;) Pics to follow.

Summer is basically oh-VAH. I start school at Columbia pretty soon and I move in Saturday! Eeeek!!

What are you guys up to?

slang tang

I think I'm quite obsessed with my new American Apparel petticoat/tutu.

Visited a friend for her birthday back in the town where I go to school. Is it just me or does going back to school feel like such a draaaaaaaaaaaaaag? I haven't even bought my books yet. Fail.

Lollaplooza. Was. Amazing. I'm so glad I went. I finally got my Hot Chip nut busted, and it felt amazing. Also saw Wavves, Los Amigos Invisibles (per my friend's request), Raphael Saadiq, Devo, and Lady-freaking-Gaga.



This is the Dee and Ricky DIY imitation that I finally got done! After I ordered the correct LEGO pieces, I put it all together. My friend hipped me to the idea of building one instead of buying the $50 version. Va$htie Kola also made a black cross version that I'm sure I could do. Will get on that soon. I just need to figure out how to get a pin on the back without it looking tacky.

Did anyone else go to Lolla???